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Self-confidence is the ability to appreciate yourself and the positive attitude you showed towards yourself; your skills, talent, body shape, voice, and whatever that comes directly from you. It means you accept and trust yourself and have a sense of control in your life. You have a positive view about your strengths and weaknesses. 

Building your self-confidence is a better way of living. It positively affects your mental health, boosts your social lifestyle and gives you a massive result. Self-esteem is also self-confidence and many factors contribute to having self-esteem. On the other hand, low-self esteem negatively affects the brain and such a person starts thinking he or she has no relevance. 

A person with self-confidence generally likes themselves, takes risks to achieve personal and professional goals, and thinks positively about the future. On the other hand, someone who lacks self-confidence is less likely to feel that they can achieve their goals, and tends to have a negative perspective about themselves and what they hope to gain in life. They do not see the need to step out of their shell because they do not think they will be accepted or appreciated among their friends, family and society. 

Self-confidence is achievable - this is the good news. It can be achieved by being intentional about the steps that lead to self-confidence. Building self confidence will help you think on a brighter side. 

1. Inculcate a good attitude. 

Your thought may be "I can't make it,  I am not beautiful, I have big eyes so I can't go for the beauty pageant, I am not brilliant or educated etc". These are wrong attitudes towards oneself and they will only drag you back into the shadow of yourself. When you build a positive attitude towards yourself; your achievement, outlook, success etc, you mentally and emotionally build your self-confidence. In return, you see and think positively, chase your aspirations, meet new people and relate confidently with them. Inculcating a positive attitude leads to the overall change in one. 

2. Dwell more on positive vibes than negative vibes. 

You must give more space for positive vibes in your brain, mind and space. Some people will intentionally come to remind you of your inadequacy, failure etc. Do not allow these sets of people in your life. They will only make you feel more inadequate. 

People with positive vibes always flow well with everyone around them. They dwell more on people's strengths and see to it that everyone around them is happy and on the same flow. Now, these are the people that you need in your space to build your self-esteem. 

3. Dwell more on your success than failure. 

Most times, people with low self-esteem dwell more on their failure which further accentuates their low self-esteem. Dwelling on past failure is a positive vibe that makes every other success irrelevant till they are forgotten. 

Learn to appreciate your wins more than you give attention to failure. When you feel more about your wins, you feel happy and relaxed, and your self-confidence will build up to achieve more.

Rhoda Makinde
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